Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Gym Crush

You just popped in the Kanye West
Get right for the summer workout tape
And ladies if you follow these instructions exactly
you might bear to pull you a rapper, a NBA player
Man, at least a dude wit' a car
So first of all we gon' work on the stomach
Nobody wants a little tight ass!
Kanye West, The New Workout Plan

I went to the gym last night, and had so much fun. I am becoming a gym person, I think. It is fun, it’s a social atmosphere and I’m losing weight! So the pain I feel in my inner thigh isn’t as bad as it would be had I pulled a muscle doing something else.

So me and Tosh are doing our step thing, falling all over the place and whatnot, and there is this girl that has the best looking body I have ever seen in person, stepping right in front of us. Now, I am probably the farthest thing from a lesbian than any woman could be. My attention to detail and attraction toward men rivals none. But I have the biggest gym crush on this girl! I wish I could have a body like hers.

She had slightly muscular arms, of course a little waist and the roundest cutest little booty. Looks good guys, huh? So now my goal is to come as close to getting a body like hers than I can. I feel comfortable comparing myself to other girls and not risking bulimia or looking like Lindsay Lohan.

Also in front of us: this man that had to be over 70 years old, who was stepping circles around everybody in the muthaphuckin class. This guy not only had all of the complicated steps down to a science, but he was adding hops and skips and turns to everything. Once, I tried to add a little jump/jog combo to my step and almost broke my ankle. So I will be watching the hot girl and not the old guy from now on.

So to make a long story short: me and Tosh are going to the gym again tonight to get all taut and shapely like our gym crush.

God’s Child asked me what exactly is the Kanye West workout plan…well I’m glad you asked.

The Kanye West workout plan comes from the song off his first album, The New Workout Plan. Basically, the song talk about how girls get all skinny and cute and they get with ballers and men with money. Now, I am working out for health reasons (anybody that has heard a story about my family knows how unhealthy they are) so landing a man isn’t an objective. But I do want to get right for the summer and get into something slinky and pleasing for myself and some of my suitors. All of that and a baller wouldn’t hurt.

(Sidebar: Now before all your girls start writing me saying that I sound like a goldigger, let’s make one thing clear. I, myself, am a baller. My good friend Jackie pointed out rather clearly to me last night that I have tons of money, and I know I have tons of influence. So attracting somebody with the same thing is fine with me. But this isn’t about men or money or anything like that. Actually, like Andre3000 says..."I just need a sweet bitch/you know sombody not to fast but not to slow/cause I dont have it my damn self and life aint easy/you know you want somebody by your side to help you smooth that thang out/you know what sayin" )

So it will be interesting to see how the male attention changes once I get a little tighter…I’ll keep you posted on how that works out.

Mood: Energized and excited.

Song For Today: Show Me the Way, Earth Wind & Fire feat. Raphael Saadiq. The new album, Illumination, is one of the hottest R&B/Soul CDs I’ve heard in years. Cop it!


At 3:06 PM, Blogger lady_in_purple said...

that's right, put in work, move yo ass, go beserk, eat yo salad no dessert- get the man you deserve! <-- fave line

btw, i've been slacking off at the gym :/ but i'm happy that you're losing weight. keep it up girl!

At 4:09 PM, Blogger BBB_0202020 said...

oh my god the best line I have heard in awhile about working out has to be what you said, "But I do want to get right for the summer and get into something slinky and pleasing for myself and some of my suitors":) That was great and congrats on doing the step class i think that's just as hard as african dance. I think I will do some taebo now, thanks for the boost

At 4:11 PM, Blogger BBB_0202020 said...

dag girl how did you get "tons of money", I want to be down. And I don't think you sound like a golddigger, a baller has a different definition for everyone.

At 4:17 PM, Blogger DM said...

Ha! Tigerkiss, I got tons of money by realizing I spent most of my money on dumb stuff and deciding not to do it anymore!

So it's not that I'm making lots of money...I'm just being wiser with it.

Let me know how taebo goes (I will ask!)

At 5:49 PM, Blogger GC (God's Child) said...

oooh, I wanna jump on the bandwagon. My skinny behind has a pot belly that just won't quit.

Tomorrow, i'll go jogging. This summer, we will conquer the world.

At 6:06 PM, Blogger lady_in_purple said...

i'm back.

just went to the gym- discovered the stair master- its my new best friend! i burned 220 calories in 20 minutes- woo-hoo!

At 8:06 PM, Blogger The Urban Author said...

Oh, my fault... I musta took a wrong turn somewhere. I was looking for the Pink Ghetto. Does anybody know where that is? Damn... I don't know how I ended up in the Women's Empowerment and Fitness Blog.

At 1:52 PM, Blogger GC (God's Child) said...

I'm back! I went running last night. about 1/2 a mile--pounding the pavement. I am going to heat something up this summer.

Urban author--you too can be empowered. It's not just for women.

At 4:31 PM, Blogger Slow Metamorphosis said...

ok that song is my regular workout song. Gotta have it when im on the elliptical. Keep on working it out girl! I have to tell you about this website too
sparkpeople.com for all people trying to lose weight. Enjoy!

At 7:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have been looking for sites like this for a long time. Thank you! » » »

At 12:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Excellent, love it! film editing classes


Post a Comment

<< Home