Tuesday, February 14, 2006

The Attack of Valentine's Day: Handy Dandy Love Notes

Having trouble finding the right text message or email to send to your sweetie? Here are a couple little ditties I came up with to help you to get your Valentine to swoon...use at your own leisure (or danger):

Happy VD…
…and I don’t mean Valentine’s Day

Happy Valentine’s Day!
I wish I never met you, but since I did, here’s some chocolate.

Happy Valentine’s Day!
Because the government has to remind you tell me that you love me!

Happy Valentine’s Day!
What’s your name again?

Happy Valentine’s Day!
You want to put that where?

Happy Valentine’s Day!
FYI, I’m not leaving the house until Wednesday

Will you be my Valentine?
If not, can you send this to your brother?

Will you be my Valentine?
If not, can you at least cut the grass?

Do you like me? Check yes or no…
Or circle both if you just want to bone.

Dear Valentine,
Even though we just met, my feelings for you are so strong.
I was going to write you a poem, but couldn’t find any words to rhyme with pregnant.

Dear Valentine,
Every second we are together makes me more creative when hiding my affair.

Dear Valentine,
@*&^@#!!!
Because words can no longer describe how I really feel about you

I miss you on Valentine’s Day…
But I’ll still give the shirts you left at my house to my new boyfriend

I miss you on Valentine’s Day…
Even though you’re away, the local skank will gladly take your place

I miss you on Valentine’s Day…
But I found a girl that almost looks like you to fill in

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