Wednesday, June 28, 2006

16 Things I Learned From The 2006 BET Awards

1. Black people sometimes start on time. I tuned in around 8:08 and missed Beyonce! Thank God for YouTube…here’s a video of her performance.

2. T.I.’s too skinny to rap acapella.

3. Damon Wayans just may be gay.

4. Ice Cube wants to desperately to be gangsta again.

5. Chris Brown is fucking Debra Lee. I know the guy is popular. But he won like 15 out of 10 BET Awards! He was on the stage more than Damon Wayans. I have to reason that he’s fucking Debra Lee. There’s no way in the world I’m the only person in America who missed the Chris Brown trend.

6. If Furonda from America’s Next Top Model was pretty, she’d look like Rihanna.

7. OK, Monique. You’re fat. We get it.

8. Ne-Yo looks like a chewed up gummy bear in the face. But boy, can he write the hell out of a song! Jay-Z was a proud poppa!

9. Busta Rhymes is the shit! His performance was the best, hands down!

10. Prince is my little purple fantasy! I don’t care if he rocks the Halle Berry Strictly Business haircut and wears makeup and high heels. Prince could have me climbing the walls and feeding him grapes any day.

11. India.Arie has to be the most unsexy singer in black music today. During the Chaka Khan tribute, I thought Stevie Wonder blowing into the harmonica was sexier than her.

12. People actually name their kids names like Julissa.

13. Yolanda Adams sings songs that aren’t about Jesus. Imagine that! Unless she was singing Sweet Thang about our Lord and Savior.

14. Andre 3000 is the only man who can look sexy dressed like a slave.

15. Vivica Fox said she was trying to bring back old Hollywood glamour in her dress...but really she looked like a hoe in a doily.

16. If you don’t watch Keyshia Cole’s new show on BET, she will come to your house and personally tell you about her struggle. For humanity’s sake…please watch the damn show. Jeez, BET.

Song For Today: Run It by Chris Brown


At 11:43 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Guess I can't be mad, since it was the BET Awards Show but dayumm Gina...why not just call it a 3+ hr infomercial. All they did was pub, promote, and self-gratify their WACK-ASS station.
Yes, Busta reigned with his performance, but that's what real hip hop is missing. F the monologues by record execs, and the lip-synched performances w/ boring staging and big booty dancers ( I kinda liked that part for a second.)
Give me the real. MC's w/ live mics, half-outta breath for the excitement from the act of performing, not from acting like u're performing (It's Goin Down...or is it? I have the single, I shoulda just played it while I watched u and Diddy diddy on the walk way w/ my tv on mute.)
Wackness makes me aggresively angry. I know 2 many talented artists to respect that crap. Now I remember why I don't care about cable.

2 Days until NeoSoul smacks Columbus in the face!!!

At 9:46 AM, Blogger The Stiltwalker said...

I learned not to watch the show. Really I didn't even know it came on till I saw your post.

At 4:04 PM, Blogger Ms. Pretty Green Eyes said...

Beyonce's video has been removed due to copyright infringements. Damn, Gina. You know I don't watch awards shows. Geez.

At 9:28 PM, Blogger GoddessNoir said...

15. Vivica Fox said she was trying to bring back old Hollywood glamour in her dress...but really she looked like a hoe in a doily.

THAT is the funniest thing I've read in a LONG time. You are too crazy.

At 8:46 AM, Blogger Cheetarah1980 said...

I watch the BET awards for comic relief, and boy did it deliver! Hilarious...
but about Ne-Yo. I don't know why, but I think he's kinda cute. I like his lips. And he really is a darn good songwriter, especially when comparing his work to most of the songs out there.

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